May 5, 2012

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Eight Valentine’s Day Movies For Highly Specific Situations

A Valentine’s Day movie, named Valentine’s Day, released two days ahead of Valentine’s Day? How groundbreaking! Specially when you understand it’s a romantic comedy (shock!) starring Julia Roberts and Jessica Alba (double shock!). It really is billed as a film for couples, which means you must take a date, and you’re encouraged to laugh at individuals who go see it alone. Or, you can skip it. In which case, do not despair there are a lot of other films to watch this Valentine’s Day, no matter who you are:

1. For Those Who Associate Valentine’s Day with Murder, Canadians:

My Bloody Valentine

Does February 14 make you feel like someone’s stabbing your heart with an axe-pick? Then this is the film for you. Filmed in Nova Scotia and released in 1981, this horror film centers on the sole survivor of a coal-mining accident, who goes on a revenge-driven rampage and proves when and all for that Canadians know both murder and love.

2. For The Desperate Handful of Who Can not Discover Human Adore

Lars and the Actual Girl

For some individuals, discovering one more human getting with whom to share this life can be a struggle. Probably you weren’t blessed with the very best of looks or with a winning character. Possibly you appreciate the music of The Bloodhound Gang. In any case, there’s a movie for you. Lars overcomes his connection troubles with people by falling in love with an inanimate object. I’m not saying that this is the way to go, but it cannot be any worse than spending yet another night alone listening to Hooray for Boobies, can it?

three. For Single White Females:

Single White Female

Rarely does a movie have its demographic in the title (see also: Gay Republicans), and this 1 had the added intrigue of Bridget Fonda and Jennifer Jason Leigh getting into a fight. It’s the perfect movie for a, properly, single white female on Valentine’s Day…along with some Haagen-Dazs.

four. For Couples Hoping to Get Laid Immediately after Dinner:


You’d think it’d be a foregone conclusion: it really is Valentine’s Day, you make reservations, consume a prix-fixe dinner at a mid-range restaurant, and then, bam, sweet lovemaking. If, nevertheless, you bring your date back to her apartment only to find the mood has vanished, pop in this current cult preferred. Not possessing sex can be a very good factor at least you do not have to worry about “vagina dentata.”

5. For Men and women Who Drink to Dull the Discomfort:

Die Challenging: With a Vengeance

A breakup can be fairly tough, even for a man as manly as John McClane. But that does not cease him from snapping out of his hangover long sufficient to jump onto a moving subway car, escape from a ticking bomb, and even call the really like of his life. Males, what have you completed lately?

6. For Bookstore Owners/ Folks Who Get Stood Up:

You have Got Mail

Finding stood up sucks, but often you could just be dodging a bullet. I’m not going to explain the circumstances behind Meg Ryan getting stood up by Tom Hanks, or why they get together at the conclusion of the film. I’m not even going to explain why I’ve noticed this film in the very first place but trust me: they really should have stayed apart. Because in the end, he’s actually not interested in her, only in destroying her indie bookstore. That ought to bring you some solace as you drink low cost, red wine, alone.

7. For Those Who Like to Geek out on Background:

The St. Valentine’s Day Massacre

It is not all about the candy hearts and “I Wuv You” cards on Valentine’s Day. Occasionally, it’s about some thing else colored red: blood. In 1929, seven men and women died on February 14 in a gunfight among two rival Chicago gangs, 1 headed by Al Capone and the other by Bugs Moran. Some forty years later, Roger Corman decided to make a film about it. The outcome is a film with a title that’s both literal and a very good metaphor for any couple breaking up on Valentine’s Day.

8. For Folks Who Actually Believe in Correct Adore:

Back to the Future

Simply because flying DeLoreans aside, is not movie about the connection amongst Doc and Marty? And doesn’t it prove that gay or straight, white-haired or perpetually young, mad scientist or aspiring rock star, enjoy actually does conquer all?

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